Answering machine

a note to future me:

a list of quotes for your answering machine

here are my favs, well it's really your favs cause you are me and I am you from the past. you dig?

Hi, I'm not home right now but my answering machine is, so you can talk to it instead. Wait for the beep.

Hello. I'm home right now but cannot find the phone. Please leave a message and I will call you up as soon as I find it.

Hello, this is Ron. I'm not home right now, but I can take a message. Hang on a second while I get a pencil. (Open a drawer and shuffle stuff around.) OK, what would you like me to tell me?

Starship Enterprise, Uhura here, can you hold please? -- Captain, there is a transmission coming in on hailing frequency seven, do you want it on screen?

Alpha Centauri Space Station. Commander Marlin can't come to the phone right now. He's either saving the universe from some dread, unnamed peril, or perhaps taking a nappie. Leave your name and number after the beep and he will return your call.

You have reached the number you have dialed. Please leave a message after the beep.

[Sung to the tune of "Ride of the Valkyries"] Leave me a message...leave me a message....etc.

Prepare for alpha test of Beep Software revision 1.05. Counting down to test: 5...4...3...2...1...

and as for my own:

You've reached Jon, I am cliff jumping off the coast of Chile right now. Leave your message and I will get back to you when I hit the ground.